A = Awareness of negative self-talk: I hear myself saying, “I do terrible at interviews … I never say the right thing at the right time.”
B = Behavioral result of self-talk: I become anxious in interviews and start feeling desperate, trying to convince the interviewers to like me.
C = Choose to reframe: I’ve had a bad experience or two with interviews, and yet I’m grateful for those experiences because I’ve learned from them. I’ve come to realize that I need to do more research prior to the interview so I better understand the company, its culture, the core issues, and how I can be a solution to those needs. I am committed to being a proactive candidate with clear value for my employer. I trust that if this interview/job isn’t the right one, that there is something else for me just waiting to be uncovered.
A = Awareness of negative self-talk: I hear myself saying, “I will never be able to learn this new technology … there’s too much info to learn … my brain has gotten fuzzy as I’ve gotten older.”
B = Behavioral result of self-talk: I get distracted and spend too much time online doing stuff that’s a waste of time. I just give up on trying.
C = Choose to reframe: The fact that I’m older and wiser has helped me to see the whole picture more easily. Instead of trying to memorize everything at once, I will take it in stages and baby steps. I remember that I learned other new software programs in the past and mastered them, as well.
A = Awareness of negative self-talk: I hear myself saying, “I’ll never get a job in this economy.”
B = Behavioral result of self-talk: I get discouraged, start over-eating, then feel fat so I don’t go out and do the face-to-face networking I should be doing, and then I feel guilty about that, so I over-eat again to help drown the bad feelings. Bottom line: I start believing that no one wants me and no one will hire me.
C = Choose to reframe: I am retraining my brain to realize that I will work again, that this is not the end of my career, and that the unexpected turns are causing me to look in new directions that I wouldn’t have considered previously. I am shifting from “looking for” job openings to “seeing” job opportunities, and then taking smart steps toward those opportunities every day. I am learning that perseverance and pushing past my comfort zones is the key to progress.
Personal ApplicationTake a few moments now and:
- Write out a couple of key limiting beliefs that are dragging you down (that’s step 1, A = Awareness).
- Next, examine what behaviors those limiting thoughts trigger (step 2, B = Behaviors).
- Finally, reframe those beliefs with a positive, resilient message of positivity and action (step 3, C = Choose).
If you find that you are having trouble believing the “reframed” perspective, experiment with putting these phrases at the beginning of the sentence.
- I am learning that …
- I am moving in the direction of …
- I am starting to see how …
- I am choosing to look at this in a new way that …
- I am open to believing that …
Next time you hear the limiting-beliefs radio station playing inside your head, notice it (without condemning yourself), then choose your new uplifting belief and — very important — do more than just think new thoughts: take positive action!If you think you can, you’re right!Questions about some of the terminology used in this article? Get more information (definitions and links) on key college, career, and job-search terms by going to our Job-Seeker’s Glossary of Job-Hunting Terms. This article is part of Job Action Day 2010.
Susan Whitcomb is the author of seven careers books, including Job Search Magic, Interview Magic, Resume Magic, The Christian’s Career Journey, and The Twitter Job Search Guide (all published by JIST). She is CEO and Founder of TheAcademies.com, which offers certification training in Career Coaching, Job Search Strategy, Twitter Career Strategy, and more.